CN: depression, self-harm, trite BS regarding both
In the wake of the news of Robin Williams’ death, I’ve seen such an outpouring of trite guff on Twitter. ‘Reach out’ ‘You ARE loved’ etc etc, all clearly from people who don’t know what it’s like to wake up and not know if your own head, your thoughts, are going to let you get through the day relatively easily.
So, my mental siblings, this is what I want to say. You’re not alone. There are MILLIONS of us in this same boat. We all have so much pressure, external and internal, to pretend that we’re okay. You know how good we all are at hiding because you do it every damned day, too. You’re ill and you have every reason to be. Don’t listen to anyone, ever, who says “What have you got to be depressed about.” It’s not a measure of your career or love life or the amount of fancy things you own. If you have the energy, throatpunch those people. If not, just imagine doing so. Do whatever you need to do to get through one more day. Make a cup of tea. Knit. Play video games. Write it all down. Watch mindless TV. Paint your nails. If you use self-harm to cope, then do that, but please be safe. Only you know how you are feeling in any given moment, and only you know what will make you feel less bad. It’s okay to tell people you’re fine, but think about saying to someone you trust that you’re not, if you have someone. The anonimity of talking to a stranger can be so much easier than to someone who has a lot invested in you being ‘normal’ and okay.
It can get better. You just need to hang on one more day and give it a chance.